Of Fractured Bones And H1N1

It's been 23 years since the first time. But as much romantic as it sounds or it might be me remembering, it's just as bad, as I still haven't figured out how to make more than 3 steps without falling on my face and landing in the most awkward of ways.

This, a week ago, resulted to a minor fracture just beneath my elbow, but being the baby I am when it comes to pain, I made my friends drive me to the hospital for x-rays and now I have it hang for almost a week now. It doesn't hurt that much anymore, but that little bit of pain and the fear of hurting it more makes me keeping it hang around my neck. One day, I swear I'll perfect the art of walking one day. Swear down.

But the cool thing is- and this one goes out to all the ladies- that I didn't get that from just walking. I'm a cool dude and I don't walk. I skate. I don't eat. I skate. I don't get laid. I skate. I don't like girls. I skate. I don't like boys. I skate. Anyway, I tried to do an ollie -skate still- and I didn't make it at first and I gave it another try - “cause I'm a sk8er guy”-. I landed on my ass, palms and elbow. So there you go.

Anyway I got an internship at a magazine and I'm waiting for a reply from another magazine. Hip hip hooray for doing work and not getting paid. But who am I kidding? I barely do any work. I write 2 or 3 articles a day and then I have all the time to clown around. But this has become less fun now days as my cat has grown older and is too bored of my games. Or so it seems. Sometimes he responds some others he just yawns.

Athens is fun minus the money problems. We found this bar the other day where whiskey costs 3.20 euros. Yup 3.20 and it's the worst watered kind of whiskey you'll ever find. First I thought it was just because the bartender had put too much ice in my glass and I asked him for straight the second time. Still, it was watered and tasteless. Kind of like that T.V show, Big Bang Theory. But can't really tell which is worse.

Talking of slightly fractured elbow bones, being bored and having nothing better to do, have I ever told you about that time I had H1N1? Well, it was Christmas 2009 when I got it. Right after seeing a band called Bellvue Cadillac. Seems like smoking at a small smoking area with everyone smoking around you it's not the healthiest thing one could do.

Anyway, it started with head aches and sore throat. Then chills down my spine and then dizziness and then slightly high fever. It was the season to be jolly that for sure. The fun thing is that I had to return to the U.K to hand in my last assignment, get my grade, pack my stuff and leave. So I was pretty nervous that I wouldn't make it, miss my hand in date for the assignment, miss my grade, leave all my stuff and get charged extra for the room I was staying in. Plus, I'd have to do the same class ALL over again. That I couldn't stand.

So, thank god the doctor said I could travel if I was feeling any better and the fever had dropped. And so it happened. I went back handed in my assignment and waited for my grades. I had two weeks to kill till my grades were out so that meant me staying there and wait.

So in January of 2010, I started going out with a friend of mine almost every Thursday night, blog more regularly, watch a lot of movies, read more books, drink more coffee than Brazil produces in a year and smoke more cigarettes than your grandpa has/had smoked in all his life.

One night as I was out at that club/bar I used to go, I met up with another friend of mine that we used to hang occasionally every Thursday night. She was cool and I liked her. Guess she liked me too, BUT she didn't know I spent my Christmas having the H1N1 disease. Which was a big deal back in the days.

So as we were hanging outside at the smoking area, talking about what we did during Christmas, and how we spent these holy days, at one point we kissed. Now I have no idea, why or how it stroke me but right after that I said with a big grin “you know I had H1N1 during Christmas...” took a drag from my cigarette and kept on smiling.

Then she pushed me slightly moved back a little and said “what's that? Is that that swine flu they've been talking on the news?” I casually said “yeah” and went on explaining how I had to wear a mask on the airplane etc etc but you should have seen her face.

I meant no harm, I didn't do it to upset her or anything and definitely I wouldn't do it to pass that on to her. But her face was more like “eww...and I just took a drag from your cigarette, let alone kissed you...you pig infected bearded unmasked weirdo.” At least that's what I read on her face. Then she said “if I have any symptoms in the recent future I'll know who to blame!” or something like that. As far as my face is concerned I bet it read, in a tipsy way, “yup I got to wear a mask on an airplane and the guy who was sitting next to me when the plane took off left and went to sit elsewhere and I got to have a full 6 hours sleep. How cool is that?”

We stopped talking a couple of months after that, guess we had nothing really in common apart from drinking, music and boredom.

On the bright side of things, as I said before, I got an internship of some sort and I'm waiting for a reply from another magazine. We have a gig on the 11th of November which by the looks of it, it does seem promising and on the 6th of December or something like that it's the graduation for my M.A degree. Now I'm off to bed and remember: learn to walk then run, don't tell a girl you just kissed you had H1N1 and Jesus Christ is waiting to high-five you at your local church so don't leave him hanging. Till the next time, bababooee and keep goofing it up.

FLIPPIN IN PHILIPPINES WITH A GUY NAMED PHILIP

Bad guys don't listen to real bad ass songs and ugly girls with hot friends won't introduce them to you because they think that they'll get prettier if they don't. Oh and before I begin, it's true that the grass can always be greener but that, only, away from the city, unless your mayor's doing a nice job with the parks.

It's been a long time but I had nothing to talk about and I was really busy doing other stuff like searching for a job and trying to do something productive with my time, hands and mind. Since nothing much have changed and it wouldn't be even remotely appropriate for the time and for me to sing “I CAN CHANGE THE WORLD WITH MY OWN TWO HANDS” . But after spending some time chugging water, smoking and listening to g-rap and in general bad ass songs I came up with this entry. So sit back, cuddle your teddy bear and read what I have to say.

I was searching for a job till I got a phone call from my uncle who told me that he knows a guy who owns a journalistic website and he'd like to meet me and discuss about a potential hiring. After calling up the guy and talking for half an hour or so, he gave me his office's address and we set up a meeting. At this point I'd like to add that I'm not very familiar with the centre of Athens, the bad areas etc apart from a couple.

So, on Thursday morning I dress up accordingly for a job interview and I set off. I get to the street where his office is supposed to be and start walking upwards to find the right number. I start walking through a park and five or six steps further in that park I hear “psst hey big guy...” and on the right and left of me junkies. Others sleeping, others talking, other bargaining and others shooting. I don't turn around and keep on walking. Further down I see a guy laid down his face pale white and his lips light purple to blue. Then some others started walking my way arguing with eachother so I considered appropriate to go at the other side of the park. Now don't imagine a big spacious park where you can walk around carelessly. It's a small beat down park and when I say I went to the other side I just switched sides and crossed over a little flower bed. That's when I passed by the guy I mentioned earlier who was looking fresher than Pauly D. From Jersey Shore.

I finally make it to the guy's office and we talk for an hour. After some getting to know each other talk and other different kind of small talk, he tells me to check his journalistic website and asks me to call him on Tuesday. Fingers crossed this will go alright.

So... “real bad/ tough guys don't listen to bad ass songs”. Take Rocky for example. He wasn't listening to gansta rap when he was training. Instead he was listening to the “Eye of the tiger” in which the lead singer's voice can go so high that instantly it makes it no bad ass at all. “Bad ass” songs these days consist of deep voices, threats, money, guns and maybe sometimes even some one getting “clicked”. Another example of a bad ass guy who didn't listen to bad ass music was John McClain. In fact the only bad ass song for John McClain is this one



Well to get to the bottom of this, the notion we have today about what's bad ass and what is not is really ridiculous and it wears out after high-school. The best example is a couple guys from my high-school that were the epitomy of cool back in the days but now no one has a clue where they are, what they're doing and very few are those who can say with certainty that they have accomplished something in their lives. So watching Scooby-Doo and porn and reading books is bad ass as far as I'm concerned.

Anyway, point number 2 that I'd like to make is that girls and guys with limited potential in getting laid because of their looks, won't meet you to their pretty friends and if they do then expect the world to come to an end any time soon.

Bye for now.

P.S: FLIPPIN IN PHILIPPINES WITH A GUY NAMED PHILIP