Tuesday 19 February 2013

Diaries Of Panties In A Twist: Shitland Pt 1


This was supposed to be a guide of the city I live in but I guess it’ll stray a little bit from it.  Guess you expected it, or not, I don’t know. Anyway, as you realized I didn’t break my tradition of straying from what I said in a previous entry and that because I keep myself occupied and busy with other things.

Things that happen in the actual real world, like feeding my cats, playing the guitar, trying to organize stuff, completely letting go of the hope of finding a job in Athens GR, noticing that this place is filled with cops and how I was told that “nobody cares” and that I “should be quiet” once again when I tried to tell the following story.

It’s been almost two months since I started driving again. After the car accident I was in I was kind of afraid of driving, but then I said “fuck it” and started again. I drive when is needed as I’m not really fond of it. And from my drives around the town I noticed one thing: There are more cops units out there than acne on a teenager’s face.

There are cops everywhere for absolutely no reason. They keep popping up and whenever pass them by they look at you, check you out, up and down, like you’re the next top terrorist. Hick accent or demanding voice, sleepy-cow eyes and the attitude of the king of the jungle.

A week ago on my way home, in the radius of 5 blocks I saw 3 units in their cars and 3 police units on scooters. Last night I got pulled over and searched. It was just like a movie. There was a flash light lighting my face on the left window and one on the right lighting my hands. I went to turn off the engine and the guy on the left says “Don’t do that sir! Stay calm and only do whatever we tell you to”. I said alright. Then he says “Okay turn off the engine. Driver’s license and i.d.” he demanded. I had none with me, so I said.
I was asked to step out of the car and after I explained how I forgot my wallet at home and amongst other excuses they said it was okay, they asked me to step out, open the trunk and let them search the car. So I did. I open the trunk and step back. Then one of them starts checking me up and down lighting with his flash light while the other 4 were searching the car.

As I was standing there one of them pulls out a bag with a tag that read “baking soda” from the back seat of my car and says to me: “what is this?” I look at him and before I have the chance to reply the guy behind him says “it’s baking soda…can’t you read?” Then the genius who was holding the bag asks me again “are you sure this is baking soda sir?” “You can open the bag and try it…” I say. As the other guy behind the genius chuckles a little.

One of them asks me to show the car’s insurance. I walk to the front seats and start searching for the insurance book and as I find it he says “it’s alright, forget about it.” Long story short, they searched everything. They even made me open my guitar’s hard case saying “haha most terrorists used to have one of these and hide Kalashnikovs in them while riding  on their bikes.” While I was thinking, “cause I look like a crazed up biker that would carry around a kalashnikov in a small suburb of Athens just in case…”

This hell is meant for us. Should we be thankful that something was meant for us and was built for us? But it’s mostly sunny here during the year, so who cares...

P.S: I still love you all like Greek cops secretly love being called sheriffs or John Rambo and like I love to talk about meaningless things. 

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