There couldn’t be a better example of the old saying “the times are a-changing” but from what happened two days or so ago. I’m saying that for plenty of reasons, not just because I just recently started realizing the full meaning of that phrase and experiencing it but also because just today I reached to a conclusion that I don’t know if it is right or wrong but from what I’ve seen till now it definitely feels right.
I have reached the age where I don’t feel right taking money from my parents to go out or for anything else I want. It feels wrong and when I do that I feel like a bum asking from my mother my cigarette and beer money when she works all day for me to go out and have fun, and I sit on my ass 24/7. Well, not exactly 24/7 but something close to 6-8 hours a day. Which is a lot. Trust me. Add to that, 8 hours of bumming around, the sleeping time plus 8 to 10 hours, plus all the time-out times for food and toilet. If I could, I’d ask from God to …oh shit there’s no such thing as God sorry.
So, after doing an extra 4 months placement for a Greek magazine, while I was in the UK, a few days ago, was the meeting with the editor, where he would finally tell me how much I’d be getting paid and everything would be official. Well long story short, everything went down the gutter. I’m not getting paid regularly just yet because “we live in some really hard economic times” as he put it and I don’t blame him one bit, because we do in a way. But how will my times get better if I don’t get paid? Another eternal question has risen after the “You’re asking for previous work experience to hire me but how will I get that goddamn experience if no one is hiring persons with no previous work experience?”
What I realized from this whole money seeking and independency seeking mini adventure of mine is that I wasn’t really living in any city that I’ve been. I was having fun. I was chilling. I was hanging around. I was at a "party" that I was invited. That is because I didn’t have to pay for anything. But now that I want independency and I don’t want to feel like a bum asking for money, I have to go out there and get it for myself. I kind of feel like a teenage lion that has to go out there and get its pray. Maybe not a lion, maybe a hyena would be a better example. No hyenas go as a pack. Anyway, you got the point of what I wanted to say. Bottom line is that I got kind of bored of this “party” that I am at, the last 21 years and now it’s time to start organizing my own “party” (did you notice the “ “ ? It’s better when I do it in a real life conversation cause I use my fingers and all and I
look really smart. Smart people do that sign right?)
Loads of other things have changed as well but this little path that I’m walking down and we all are, no one could describe it better than Andrew Jackson Jihad in one of his songs, “First we were babies, we're birthing and dying /Then we were children, we were playing and crying / And then we were teenagers we were smoking and fucking/ But now we're all grown up and we're sadly sighing”. Or at least that seems the best way to describe how I see things right now, even though I believe that I’m stuck somewhere in between the third and fourth line. Hopefully I won’t get to that last line till I’m forty years old. I also hope I don’t get bald.
Bottom line of all this, is that I hope I don't get bald when I grow up. That's all I wanted to say, but since I had to do it in a bloggish form...here you go.
No comments:
Post a Comment